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Putting a leash on our outbursts

Putting a leash on our outbursts

My Journey with Sign 3:134

By Shama F.

Jeddah, Saudi Arabia

الَّذِينَ يُنفِقُونَ فِي السَّرَّاءِ وَالضَّرَّاءِ وَالْكَاظِمِينَ الْغَيْظَ وَالْعَافِينَ عَنِ النَّاسِ ۗ وَاللَّهُ يُحِبُّ الْمُحْسِنِينَ

Who spend [in the cause of Allah ] during ease and hardship and who restrain anger and who pardon the people – and Allah loves the doers of good;

(Qur’an 3:134)

My husband tells me that life comes in phases. We learn that life is a test and we all are being tested with different things. This is the teaching from the Book about which there is no doubt, the Noble Qur’an. It also tells us that we must run toward good deeds. Every good deed matters. One missed opportunity haunts you for the rest of your life but it also teaches you a good lesson!

It was one of those chilly December nights. I was comfortable and cosy in my new red quilt. My mother got it stitched for me as each year it was getting colder. That night, as I was about to fall asleep, I heard someone shivering and moaning on the street which was right below the first floor balcony of our flat. That balcony was attached to my room. I could not shake that sound off, now sleep was nowhere near. I got restless. It was the middle of the night and everyone was asleep. What came to my mind was that I must go down and give my new quilt to this shivering person. His moaning would not let me sleep. But as we all know our weakness as human beings and the whisperings of the devil make a simple good deed seem too difficult to do by putting barricades in the way. To me, the late night hour, everyone sleeping, the locked main gate and the fear of going down alone were the barricades. I convinced myself that if all these hurdles were not present I could have surely given my quilt to a person in need.

I consoled my guilty conscience and tried to go to sleep only to face the rest of my life remembering this one incident of a missed opportunity!

This happened over 15 years ago. It still makes me feel bad when I think about that man, shivering alone in the chilly New Delhi winter. What must have happened to him? Did he survive the cold? We hear about people dying of extreme cold and heat every year in the North of India.

After many years, when I reflected on this sign in the Qur’an, I realised how important it is to spend in the way of Allah in any kind of circumstance.

Further on in life, I was tested with my short temper and difficulty in adjusting with people who were quite different in their temperament. When I reflected on this sign from Allah I was so moved that I decided to control myself and my anger. As a reminder, I wrote this sign on a chart paper and put it high up on the wall of my room, so that I be constantly reminded of the great rewards of controlling one’s anger and pardoning those who hurt or wrong you. This sign helped me a lot. I started avoiding arguments and chose to keep silent even when I could have shouted and shown my authority and anger. Sometimes I was too harsh to my children but this sign was a great help to me in collecting myself in those difficult moments of frustration and lack of self control. Alhamdulillah! The only driving force toward any goodness is the love of the Creator and He says that He loves those who are Muhsineen, those who excel in good deeds!

 

About Shama F.

The writer is pursuing her tafseer studies and writes under the pen name of Shama F.

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